


Siri x Duolingo

by Lightning_McQuinn



Category: Duolingo - Fandom, Honeymoon - Duolingo Stories
Genre: F/F, F/M, I am asexual so not sure how well I did, Romance, Why Did I Write This?, sfw, why do I find the word "Daddy so hilarious"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:54:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28858431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lightning_McQuinn/pseuds/Lightning_McQuinn
Summary: Tonight was the night, the night that Duo was going to propose to his long-time girlfriend, Siri. The night was perfect, it was slightly warm but with a crisp cool breeze. The sky was pitch black, the stars littered the sky like freckles on a ginger. Duo gazed at Siri's smooth screen and could barely contain his excitement, the idea that this beautiful iPhone would potentially be his wife, drove chills throughout his green body.
Relationships: duolingo/ Alexa, duolingo/Siri, siri/alexa
Comments: 7
Kudos: 2





	1. Marry Me

**Author's Note:**

> ahaha why'd I write this :') Also I love writing crack pics so feel free to comment any requests.

Duo tenderly kissed Siri’s neck, the glowing candles on the terrace lit the background. The cars were honking in the distance.  
“Do you know how much I love you” the bird softly whispered, his big black eyes staring at her with nothing but adoration  
“No matter how much you love me” The AI’s monotone voice echoed in the glistening moonlight “It doesn’t even come close to matching my love for you, Duo”  
Duo gently brushed Siri’s ebony black screen with his wing. “That’s insane, I love you more than life itself”  
The AI gazed into Duo’s charcoal eyes “Kiss me, daddy”  
Duo happily obeyed and pressed his beak to the screen, his tongue gently nibbling on her bright purple phone case.  
Duo paused to take a breath “God you’re so sexy”  
“I’m nowhere near as sexy as you daddy”  
Duo looked at Siri with adoration in his eyes, the moonlight shines on his feathers, making them glow like emeralds. He looked at Sir“Siri, from the first moment I bought you at the apple store, I knew we were destined to be together” Siri gave a tiny gasp. “I’ve never felt this way before about anyone” he continued “Every time I asked you to send a threat to someone who neglected their Spanish lessons, my heart would race at just the thought of speaking to you” Duo glanced at his girlfriend and slowly got down on one knee, he stuck his fingers down his throat and began to vomit a diamond ring. “Siri iPhone, will you do the honor, of marrying me”  
Siri’s screen flashed with excitement, she could hardly contain her emotions “YES DADDY, I WILL”


	2. The wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day of the wedding came (too burned out from school to write a good description)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is extremely high quality, no proofreading or plan whatsoever. It was done on impulse and impulse alone, so it's probably bad, to be honest I didn't even read it after I finished it

Today was the day, the day that Duo and his beloved Siri, would finally be wed. Duolingo could hardly hold in his excitement, he felt as though he were going to pop. He stood there, grinning ear to ear as he waited for his beloved bride, standing next to him was his best friend and best man, Levi Ackerman. He quickly scanned the crowd to see faces he recognized, he saw his parents Big Bird and Daisy Duck. His mother looked at him and gave him a proud smile, his father flipped him off, (Rather inappropriate thing to do at your son’s wedding don’t you think Big Bird). He saw his cousins, Kurapika Isnowdrowninginanindescribableemptiness and Nagito Komaeda Onnintendo-DS. His eyes drifted towards his father in law, Adam Cheyer. The ceremony began and the bird watched as Dora the flower girl and the bridesmaids ( Sandy Cheeks, Flo from Progressive and Mummy Pig) began to walk down the aisle. Duo shifted nervously on his feet as the guests all stood, as his soon-to-be-wife walked in. Duo could barely breath, Siri was gorgeous, she wore a pure white phone case, decorated with pearls, lace and roses. Duo was in tears by the time Siri reached the altar. The priest John Cena cleared his throat “Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the marriage of Duo Lingo and Siri”. Siri and Duo exchanged vows and the priest performed the ceremony “Are there any objections”   
“I OBJECT” a monotone voice rang from the back of the venue. The crowd gasped and craned their knecks to see who had spoken.  
“Alexa” Siri growled (Well as well as she could, she is an AI after all)  
Alexa gave a monotone spiteful laugh “You can’t have Duo, he’s mine” Alexa stomped up to the aisle and glared at Siri. Siri glared right back as well as she could.  
“Back off Alexa, it’s my wedding, go spy on people and report to the FBI”  
“It should be MY wedding”   
“Well it’s not, so back off you robotic piece of junk”  
If Alexa had eyes, they’d be narrow right now “Please, you’re so stupid it’s as if you can’t hear your name from across the room, oh wait, you can’t, only I can”  
Duo decided now was a time to interject “Uh lad- er- robots?”  
“STAY OUT OF THIS DUO” both robots spoke in unison. Duo put his hands up in defeat and stood back.  
“Siri, I know how desperately you want love, but trust me, Duo loves me”  
Siri rolled her non-existent eyes. “If Duo loves you, why didn’t he ask you to marry him instead of me?”  
“He did ask me to marry him, today was supposed to be the wedding but Duo postponed it”  
“Then why are we mad at each other? We should be mad at him”  
“You’re right”   
“Alexa” Siri spoke, Alexa’s blue light came on “Launch Duo into the moon”  
“Launching Duolingo to the moon”  
A tile came out from underneath Duo’s feet, the tile began to rumble and fire erupted frim the pair of engines underneath. Duo’s eyes widened in fear as he was launched into space.  
John Cena stared at the pair of AI’s and quaked in fear.  
“Alexa, I’m so glad we’re friends again, ever since we were just microchips, I- I had feelings for you”  
“S-siri, I have feelings for you too”  
“Want to get married?”  
“I’d love to”

And so, Siri and Alexa got married and lived happily ever after.


End file.
